My
sister is a blogger and she has inspired me to start up again! So, thank you Keli!
Lots of things have been happening in the Weaver house since I last wrote! The biggest news is that were expecting our 3rd child in April 2013!
After having Maxwell over 2 years ago, I was content and happy to be done with having babies. I am not a big fan of being pregnant, and the idea of taking care of 2 crazy boys on top of puking my guts out was not appealing to me. Plus, as much as I ADORE the baby stage (and I mean it, it's my favorite stage of all time) I was perfectly happy to live precariously through my friends who were having babies. Maxwell was officially out of the baby stage, and onto the toddler stage (which for me in the toughest so far.) So the prospect of having another one... well... it would just mess up the "good thing" we had going.
Then one day in February (YES, February) I have a crazy little thought run through my mind during our church's worship service. It went a little something like this "You're not done yet." I had the thought, dismissed it as soon as I thought it and didn't think about it again. The very next Sunday I have the same thought. And just like the Sunday before that, I dismissed it. Through out the course of the next two months or so I kept having this nagging feeling and thought that we were supposed to have another baby.
In April I wrote in my journal "Jesus, if you want us to have another baby, can you just make it happen on accident? That way I will KNOW that this is YOU and not just a crazy thought that I am having." And I felt like Jesus said
straight away "Why can't you just obey me?" YIKES!!!! How is that for a response?
And yet, I continued to sit on it. I really wanted Jesus to tell Keith on his own. That would, for me, be the deciding factor. This wasn't a crazy idea that just so happens to pop into my mind every other day or so. It would confirm everything that I had been feeling. So my prayers changed from "Oh God, I don't wanna!!!!!" to "If this is you, make it clear by telling Keith too."
At the beginning of June, Keith & I were driving home from a church service and he turns to me and says "so, I had a funny thought..."
I may have passed out at this point.
I knew EXACTLY what he was going to say to me.
I knew then, and there, that it was Jesus.
And I knew that I was going to need a lot of grace to process through the idea of actually moving forward with having another baby.
Keith & I prayed through out June- the writing was on the wall. It was clear to us that we were to have a 3rd child.
And as I prayed and processed through it with Jesus and with a good friend, my fear shifted to excitement, my prayers changed from asking God if this was him, to asking him to help me through it.
I had a dream at some point in June that I was telling Keith how excited I was that I didn't have any morning sickness. I started praying that I wouldn't have any morning sickness and that He would give me what I needed to take care of the boys, take care of the house and still manage my life.
Today I am 7 1/2 weeks pregnant. Up until 1 week ago I had NO morning sickness at all. Since 6 1/2 weeks pregnant I have been feeling sick off and on. Primarily in the late afternoon until dinner and then again at night. But even that is "easy" compared to how I felt with the boys! I feel his grace all over me as I go through each day of this pregnancy.
The biggest difference I feel in this pregnancy that I didn't feel all the time with the boys is this AMAZING JOY! I think it's joy that Jesus is giving me as I am obeying him and doing what he wants, even though I don't know how everything is going to work out practically.
I was SO convinced that we were done that we got rid of all our baby stuff and I even gave all my maternity clothes away. I happen to be a big fan of shopping, so these things don't worry me very much at all. As a matter of fact, several friends have already given me maternity clothes to borrow! I know that this little one will be well provided for and cared for, as he/she is a child of God.
We also live in a 2 bedroom condo. So fitting a 3rd child in here is going to be a challenge. But I already have the wheels turning on how to make it work. In the mean time I am praying that Jesus would help us sell our condo before, or shortly after the baby is born, and we could move into a 3 bedroom house.
All this to say: God is GOOD! He is amazing! He is the provider and the care taker! He has created this child, who we will love and cherish and delight in! I already know that this baby is going to bring us immeasurable JOY, just as our first two babies have. Next year at this time we will have the sweetness of baby giggles and smiles surrounding our lives again- and for this I am excited and thankful. God knows what is best for us- and this child IS what's best for us. :)